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Friday, 4 January 2019

Mid Winter, New Year...

A New Year...
2019...
Full of promise...
full of life...
full of adventure...
and making the most of simple pleasures.

Saying good bye to the year that was...
opening a new door, a new chapter...

Making the most of my candles on these dark January days...My home felt bare without the Christmas tree so I managed to buy some wonderful Dorma Foxgloves in the sales...very realistic! Almost like the real thing.
( The Amazing Winter Garland and memorial wall in the great hall, Cotehele House and gardens, National Trust)
(The River Tamar runs along from Calstock, Cornwall up towards Cotehele House and Quay)
Wonderful lino print, paper cuttings of flowers, birds and animals a memorial of those lost in the war inspired by the garland from the many flowers grown at the gardens at Cotehele.

(We had a lovely drive to Totnes a lovely old town set on a Devon hill)

I started a post and then deleted it several times...
I sat and thought deeply about the year that had just passed...In all it was a difficult one. 
But ...then I thought. I am so lucky with the life I do have. O.k it was not easy...My father's cancer has been so hard going, especially the guilt of not living closer to him. My Christmas was spent seeing my father go through injections and pain and a huge sore from a previous tumour on his back. But I did get to spend some really good quality time with him. I went to see him for the whole Christmas week. It was not all bleak and upsetting, We did laugh, We did have a Christmas together. And I got to hug him and cook for him. And make a difference to his life. We even walked to a local country hotel for posh Tea. He mainly slept that week. I sat and held his hand like he used to hold mine when I was a little girl falling a sleep.  I had quality time with him. I needed that.  I have come back to Devon with mixed emotions. Slightly numb. I missed Stevie and Sophia so much.
I took the decorations down when I got home. It was like cleansing the soul. I needed a fresh start.
So my New years day felt like that day I returned home. We have been looking after my Twin's cat, Luna.
Having a fur baby to look after has actually helped me and having that cosy lap friend to stroke has been quite comforting.  But the most comforting thing of all was looking through my files of photographs, many from my instagram account, kazzyloves. It cheered me up no end. I love the seasons. I love capturing a quick snap of a happy moment, usually out on an adventure...Photography does help me so much with my mental well being. And walking too along the coast or deep in the countryside. When I was back in my childhood home town on the East Anglian coast I realised it doesnt feel like 'home' to me like it did before I met Stevie. I've realised how much I have fallen in Love with Devon. I really Love my life here. I have Stevie to thank for that too.  Sophia has had a really positive and happy first term at Secondary School and that fills me with delight and joy for her. I hope it continues. At the moment she has a lovely group of girl friends.
She has sent in a demo vid for an audition for the role as 'Matilda' in the theatre production. 
She's growing up fast. I'm starting to get my head around this. And I am enjoying watching her turn in to a bright, talented, beautiful, loving young lady. I've been so proud of her this year.
I decided a few years back not to start a year with New years resolutions but instead to focus on those 'ordinary' happy moments and remember how lucky I am to have what I have.
Keeping a blog journal this year and keeping up with my blog postings has really helped me focus on those Simple, yet so pleasurable moments in my life.

I wish you all a Happy 2019...

I have a lot of blogs to catch up on...As always Thank you for the uplifting and kind comments they've really helped me through this year...

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